This weeks lesson was recovering a sense of identity.
The biggest takeaway I got was allowing yourself to do the things you enjoy doing and focusing on the importance of time.
Julia Cameron talks about how we always say “we will do this when…” or only allow ourselves to get started on projects or do the things we enjoy doing only when we have enough time.
We allow that “time” limitation to stop ourselves from doing what we want.
She encourages us to instead of waiting until you have a large chunk of free time, what would happen if we allowed ourselves to do small, creative acts in small bits of time?
What if you wrote a poem during your lunch break? What if you took 15 minutes here to meditate or take a walk or buy some art supplies or listen to music or whatever it is your creative heart desires?
Again, waiting until you have enough free time means that you may be waiting forever.
It felt so so good this week to allow myself things I usually stop myself from doing because I feel as though I don’t have enough time.
For example, one day this week after work I went down to the beach and it was a particularly warm day. I really wished I had brought my bathing suit so I could go swim and felt guilty that I wasn’t taking advantage of the warm weather because it wasn’t going to stay warm for long. I had limited opportunities to go swimming!
Instead of making a mental note for the future, I took advantage of the NOW and went swimming in my bra and underwear. Even though I was worried about people looking at me strange or that I would get my car all sandy and wet after or that I didn’t even have a towel, I put all that aside and went swimming.
The joy and freedom I felt while in the cool water dancing with the waves unparalleled all the worries I had if I hadn’t taken advantage of the time that I had now.
Another example is that I discovered this book I really wanted to read and found out they had it at the library. I’m already reading a few books that I wanted to finish before I started anything new so I thought, no I’ll wait, let me finish what I have now and then I’ll go read that other book…when I have more TIME.
I took notice of this thought and then drove myself to the library, checked out the book and finished it in less than 2 days.
It was so interesting to me to see how many times throughout my day do I have the impulse to do something, eat something, or go somewhere but I stop myself because I tell myself I’ll do it when I have more time or I’ll just do it another day when I really want to.
Listening to those impulses and just acting on them in the moment satisfied my desire to do those things so I no longer had to think about them and felt better and happier by allowing myself to do what I wanted to do!
This week I am proud to say I completed all 7 days of the morning pages, but I will say a few days was super HARD to get myself to do them. I REALLY didn’t want to.
Even this morning I woke up with my love in bed and it felt delicious to wake up this way on a Sunday morning since during the week he leaves earlier than I have to get up. I wanted to just stay in bed and cuddle and forget about my pages but then I thought “they will only take 15-20 min, I can spare 15-20 min” and with his encouragement I was able to complete them.
I’m still having trouble with what exactly constitutes as an artist date because there are plenty of times throughout the week that I dedicate to having some alone time or doing something that I want to do that COULD be my artist date but if I didn’t have that specific intention before I started out, does it still count?
This week, I went for a long walk in the woods and on the beach while listening to hertz music.
Hertz music is a vibrational frequency that is supposed to heal certain areas of your life and I love listening to them because it’s like a pulsating meditation.
I put my headphones on and am instantly transported into a spiritual and very aware and present state.
On my walk I felt so alive and connected with the trees, dirt, and leaves. I danced my way through crunching leaves and reveled in how many different sounds could be heard and made in nature.
I smelled the most delicious scents I’ve ever smelled; the aroma of wet dirt, flowers of all kinds with a sweet odor, the smell of sand and water mixed together, and of tall grass.
Taking a walk like this and just being present and free put me in such a beautiful, open, and creative place.
Task of the week:
Write down 20 things you enjoy doing.
1. Seeing theater
2. Exploring a new city
3. Reading a good book or a new play
4. Taking a walk through nature
5. Going to yoga
7. Watching the sunset at the beach
8. Swimming in the ocean
9. Eating delicious food
11. Cuddling in bed
12. Having orgasms
13. Expanding my mind
14. Taking a bath
15. Having dinner with friends
16. Hearing other people’s stories
17. Going to coffee shops and reading or writing
19. Ice skating
20. Listening to interview podcasts